medial // caesura

Well done is how I liked my steak as a teenager.  I remember my father trying to convince me that pink juice filling the plate as I pierced a bite with my fork was good.  I ran upstairs crying and vowed vegetarianism for a while.  Then settled on well done.  Now that I'm "grown up," I like medium well.  My father approves. I went to two high school graduations last week.  Both talked of past achievement and future potential, but the second spoke of more than hope in a successful life on earth.  The ultimate goal, said the commencement speaker, is the approval of an eternal God and heavenly Father with the words:   "Well done, my good and faithful servant."  Last week, I had another episode with anxiety.  It was triggered by dwelling on summer:  the stress of caring for three boys mostly on my own.  Cleaning house and packing for a two-week trip and this entirely on my own.  Granted, I put additional pressure o...

Today I finished-- in less than 24 hours-- Toni Morrison's latest book, Home .  I thought I was captivated by the Hunger Games trilogy last month or even caught up last week in My Name is Mary Sutter , the historical fiction by a first-time novelist whose name I've now forgotten, but no, this, this Home was a truly great book.  It was as if I were reading a really, really long prose poem.  The heart-wrenching characterization, the storyline at once fantastic and familiar, and the language so beautifully crafted, my mind would say in hushed reverence as I re-read a choice line--wow, that's exactly how she must have felt; so true; or just beautiful.  Letting the words roll around in my mouth as I read them slowly aloud:  "Color, silence, music enveloped him.  This feeling of safety and goodwill, he knew, was exaggerated, but savoring it was real"  (118).  This after a wonderfully painted image the main character, Frank "Smart" Money sees as he has...

Field Trip to the Zoo  (a poem)   His head lurched awkwardly  smudging  his prickly copper  scales on trembling fingers-- live membrane  slaughtered by senses no way to sift fear, a blackout. Just skewer it! Like I do the asparagus you steam just right crunchy and crisp Written for Monday's Melting with Shawna   Using the entire word list because I cannot do otherwise: tremble , prickly , lurch , asparagus , blackout , copper , scaly , smudge , skewer , sift , membrane , slaughter

You Won't Help Shoots Grow by Pulling Them Up Higher.  --Chinese proverb A fitting quotation from my daily calendar for April 23, 2012, my eldest son's 15th birthday.  It's been a great few days.  Two medals at ROTC awards banquet, ( one thousand gifts 100:  the look on D's face as he brought back each medal to me.  The thrill of applause enlivening his eyes, the joy smeared all over his face as he received recognition from peers and mentors, and the pride as he extended the medal toward me as he walked between tables to return to ours) lots of good pictures from the event, lots of sweet Facebook birthday wishes for D today, cards and gifts from family all arriving in time, a brother's Tball game, and birthday serenades on the phone. . .what more could a guy, or his mom want. But  (is there always a "but" with me?) at the T-ball field, a great-grandfather of his youngest brother's teammate said, "Fifteen years old?  Uh-oh that means you are ...

We just returned from a magical trip to the land of dreams.  Disney. . .it really is all it's cracked up to be.  If you use your imagination, it is truly magical.  Maybe it's the music, the fairytale-like surroundings, but when I glide down Main Street USA, I feel like skipping or dancing and I think I did, in fact, each time we entered or exited the park.  The drums in the Animal Kingdom had the boys and me dancing too.  It has to be the visual and aural combination that takes me out of the world for a little while. (one thousand gifts 93:  a trip to Disneyworld ( I know this is not what Voscamp has in mind.  It's not small, discrete recognition of God's blessings by any means, but it was comprised of so many of those gratitude-filled moments that I had to just sum it up in one.) Music can transport me anytime, though, as the boys and I danced our hearts out on the way to school this morning to "Dynamite" by Taio Cruz .  Well, as much dancing a...

"My assumption is that the story of any one of us is in some measure the story of all of us." -- Fredereick Beuchner In When I Lay My Isaac Down, Carol Kent writes about the difficult times in our lives, e.g.  the death of a loved one, debilitating disease, accident, or addiction, when we choose to believe God is good and loving "even in this."  Even if nothing changes. . .This past week, while I was shopping with my eldest, I was approached as I have been several times in the past few months by a total stranger who claims that my son is going to be healed completely; one said gradually, another said suddenly, but all agreed on one caveat:  If I not only prayed, but also believed. I have prayed.  I also believe that if it is God's will, then it will be done.  But I can't say that I believe D's being made whole here on earth to be God's will. Is my doubt preventing me from witnessing the miraculous?  Kent tells the story of a missionary, Graci...

crisp bite apple crunch morning nourishment                                        a body drifts                                                                                               Soul seeks salt allergic to aloe's soothing natural in June's grass mint rampant fast Droning doctors, fancy medicine,  absent--              ...